After a weekend of boiling in a pot of piss- I decided time to snap out of the funk and get the going on, going on.... I can't sit there and allow silly little insecure people get the best of me. So in an effort to squash the remaining tensions I hit up the gym, as Jane Fonda once said in her lil striped leotard- Feel the burn baby, feel the muther fuckin burn. I worked up a sweaty mess this morning on the Elliptical machine. I don't have the co ordination to work it backwards but I try, man I try. Fartboy with the headband, jumps on besides me and starts to read my copy of Instyle over my shoulder. He points to some lingerie on the page and tells me I would like hot in that. I look at him like he is retarded and tell him one day I am gonna run him down in my car and run his ass over, and then back up and do it again and again till he is a mess of goo on the road. He laughs at me, as if I am flirting or joking, but I am not. I seriously want his little headband wearing self to fuck off but he never seems to get the hint. I wonder if I will ever get sooo hard up for a lay that I actually fuck his smelly ass. Naaaah, I could never be that desperate.... Please God no.... A lazy afternoon and a really good solo session leads to the wickedest cum, I have ever had- sooo kudos to me... Good job shrooms, good job... I got a hold of the Halloween candy last night so decided to punish myself by hitting the gym for the second time for a wicked body pump class. I kicked it up a notch and grabbed heavier weights than normal. I positioned myself behind the hottest chick in the class, for two reasons, if I gotta watch someone squat and lunge in front of me- it might as well have a fine ass, and secondly I tend to push myself harder when I am in competition. Sooo the music starts and I loose myself in the adrenaline. I feel my muscles quiver and shake as the barbell becomes heavier and heavier with every lift. But I like what I see in the mirror, so I keep it up. I love the cut of my arms, I have some Angela Basset biceps for sure. We lay down on our mats for triceps and as I raise my arms over my head, I realize I must of forgotten deodorant under one arm because it is just foul.... I turn my head and give the other a quick inconspicuous snifferooo, nope powdery fresh. But the smell is kinda bothering me, cuz I do take pride in being a well groomed clean kinda girl and this little funk is disturbing me so much that it breaks my concentration and I drop the friggin barbell on my forehead. So now I got a raging pain burning across my brow and I smell, fuck this day just got retarded... Ohh well, the bruise on my head will fade ( I hope...) and my weekend scars have disappeared and I look freakin fabulous.... So what, I have totally chaos when it comes to the ex- I am taking some friends advice and limiting my contact to slim to none. And so what I can't seem to get laid- I am working some magic with this rabbit. And so what I can't seem to keep a man, all the one's I've had weren't worth shit anyways (well, 95%) So new skies ahead for Shroomy- new prospects call me- 1-866-hot-forU only $2.99 a minute.....
Monday, October 23, 2006
Cherry ice cream smile, I suppose it's very nice
After a weekend of boiling in a pot of piss- I decided time to snap out of the funk and get the going on, going on.... I can't sit there and allow silly little insecure people get the best of me. So in an effort to squash the remaining tensions I hit up the gym, as Jane Fonda once said in her lil striped leotard- Feel the burn baby, feel the muther fuckin burn. I worked up a sweaty mess this morning on the Elliptical machine. I don't have the co ordination to work it backwards but I try, man I try. Fartboy with the headband, jumps on besides me and starts to read my copy of Instyle over my shoulder. He points to some lingerie on the page and tells me I would like hot in that. I look at him like he is retarded and tell him one day I am gonna run him down in my car and run his ass over, and then back up and do it again and again till he is a mess of goo on the road. He laughs at me, as if I am flirting or joking, but I am not. I seriously want his little headband wearing self to fuck off but he never seems to get the hint. I wonder if I will ever get sooo hard up for a lay that I actually fuck his smelly ass. Naaaah, I could never be that desperate.... Please God no.... A lazy afternoon and a really good solo session leads to the wickedest cum, I have ever had- sooo kudos to me... Good job shrooms, good job... I got a hold of the Halloween candy last night so decided to punish myself by hitting the gym for the second time for a wicked body pump class. I kicked it up a notch and grabbed heavier weights than normal. I positioned myself behind the hottest chick in the class, for two reasons, if I gotta watch someone squat and lunge in front of me- it might as well have a fine ass, and secondly I tend to push myself harder when I am in competition. Sooo the music starts and I loose myself in the adrenaline. I feel my muscles quiver and shake as the barbell becomes heavier and heavier with every lift. But I like what I see in the mirror, so I keep it up. I love the cut of my arms, I have some Angela Basset biceps for sure. We lay down on our mats for triceps and as I raise my arms over my head, I realize I must of forgotten deodorant under one arm because it is just foul.... I turn my head and give the other a quick inconspicuous snifferooo, nope powdery fresh. But the smell is kinda bothering me, cuz I do take pride in being a well groomed clean kinda girl and this little funk is disturbing me so much that it breaks my concentration and I drop the friggin barbell on my forehead. So now I got a raging pain burning across my brow and I smell, fuck this day just got retarded... Ohh well, the bruise on my head will fade ( I hope...) and my weekend scars have disappeared and I look freakin fabulous.... So what, I have totally chaos when it comes to the ex- I am taking some friends advice and limiting my contact to slim to none. And so what I can't seem to get laid- I am working some magic with this rabbit. And so what I can't seem to keep a man, all the one's I've had weren't worth shit anyways (well, 95%) So new skies ahead for Shroomy- new prospects call me- 1-866-hot-forU only $2.99 a minute.....
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16 comments:
Ah, Shrooms. I don't think that there's a man out there strong or confident enough to take you on (yet).
You're a goddess. (as all single moms are)
Forget the headband loser, he'll never get the hint. And don't you worry, I'll never let you get that desperate. I'll be there to give you an extra pair of helping hands.
And holy shit, babe. Are you ok? A barbell to the forehead, ouch. *Kisses* to make it all better.
look at you kickin ass! good stuff. i hate to admit that i giggled at your brbell incident but ... yes i did lol
its all good though because we all have those moments when we realize that fuck if we arent happy, at least we can be content. :p
if your ever back in the valley let me know. we can head up to scottsdale and treat all the rich pretty boys like the brainless hot pieces of ass that they are hehehehe
I am just loving sisterhood in all kinds of fantastic ways right now...
Sorry to hear about the bruised head. It's going to take a lot more than that to keep you down.
Is your name Rio?
So this farty fellow...does he look like
a) hipster doofus
b) deadhead jock
c) Icelandic Epic Poetry grad student
d) OH GOD! MY EYES ARE BURNING!
So you were in a funk and then you became the funk? Ooo ooo that smell....
Sherry- Ohhh I am convinced there is someone perfect out there for me- I just think he isn't convinced...yet.... I appreciate the helping hands- thanks baby cakes- bring those little hands right here, and there and ummm over here....
Yasamin- mmm, yeah I wasn't lovin the barbell incident- nice little lump action going on, good things bangs are back in style.... I miss Phoenix!!! Are Zia's and Buffalo Exchange still around- between the two they ate up most of my paycheck... miss it totally miss it- and Scottsdale snob boys - love it- although I used to pick up lil gypsy boys on Mill, and make them do my bidding for a couple of days- yeah I was kinda skanky back in the day....
samuraifrog- no matter where you go- still a lil perv eh?? That is ok, I am sure we will let you watch.... ha.... yeah a little bruise won't hold me back- key- theme musi: I'm a Survivor! cheesetastic stupidness....
RA Porter- mmm, a mix of B and D. Sweaty and farts up a storm- I bring my nose plug or I exit pronto when I see him coming... Nasty fucker.....
Dale- you know you wanna lick these armpits baby!!! (gross, I just made myself gag.....)
Some people just never catch a fucking clue. I just don't get it.
In order to get over the ex, you need to stop talking to him. Regardless of how hard it is. Cause, it's fucking hard. Really fucking hard. Super duper fucking hard. You could also try getting under someone else. Not the stinky guy..but somebody.
No Longer Blonde Vigilante- oohhhh trust me sweetie, I am over the ex... I have been over him for a very long time... But when you have kids- you have to talk, and the idea is that you somehow put the past in the past and be friendly for the kids sake. He just always chooses girls that give me hell for some reason- the last one was just as bad... she got in my face and tried to start fights- it was insane... I am way mellow- despite what you may think- I just wanna exist and be happy.... and yeah I need to get up under and on top of someone- for fuck's sake!
yeah ZIA still rocks it when it comes to media and Buffalo Exchange is still around too. i used to blow all my $$$ at Zia... so bad for you. its like a fucking addiction.
lmao @ gypsy boys on mill!! i know huh every time i go down there... i trip out on the mix of hippies druggies and jocks all mingling drunkenly. lol man i like 5 minutes from mill ave. literally.
So THAT'S your phone number. Now I can call you and leave you a message -- meeeowww! ;)
You're going to get laid soon. I just know it. I can sense. My psychic powers are telling me it's gonna be awesome....
From now on I'm gonna call you The Monkey Jane. You must have a stunning shape. Even tho I'm not quite sure if it is really healthy to hit up the gym twice a day.
You must be bendy like Madonna! Able to kiss your own arse from both directions?!
You poor thing!
That barbell must have hurt, i hope you didn't make a scene - someone noticing you sniffing your pits then trying to fracture your skull with a weight.
That is exactly why I don't go to the gym anymore.
You just need to keep positive and go places where you can be exposed to new people. Either out with friends in groups or during the day. Someone will notice you and wanna jump right on. LOL.
Good luck, chicky! You deserve some.
Yasamin- well that is it, I am coming for a visit!!! and crashing at your pad- 5 min from Mill- sooo there dude!!!
Haley-O- keep your cat off my answering machine!!! As much as I bitch and moan- I really am not that hard up- mostly holding out, for someone special....
my days of random one night stands are behind me...
Flo- no prob not, I get a bit obsessed with the whole weight issue... I admit it, but I think much healthier to hit the gym than turn to drugs or alchohol- which were my past vices, so although I may get a bit obsessive I am on the path to healthiness.. I don't know about kissing my own arse- I am not on the yoga kick- yet......
speakeasy- naaah no one noticed the barbell taking me out, I usually workout in the back of the room- I like to check out all the pretty asses.... thanks cutie for all your encouraging words!
I've nearly dropped a barbell on my fucking head as well, always assumed I was the only one.
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