Bring Up Their Medical ConditionI was sitting at the bar, when Jani Lane slid in the seat next to me. He immediately put his freakishly white hand on my knee and told me, "Ohhh, you're soo cute." His hand began to climb up my leg edging up my mini skirt. I shuddered and looked at him and asked, "Do you have that hypertyroid condition like Barbara Bush, cuz your eyes really bug out, it's kinda creepy." His hand retreated and he got off his stool and walked away, looking like a wounded bird. Years later, I saw him on Celebrity Fit Club talking about how he battled that affliction for years.
Ohhh, I guess I hurt his feelings....
12 comments:
It's all about the Synthroid, baby.
Lol...oh man. That dude so needed metal to get laid. I'll bet no one had compared him to Barb before, tho.
I'd like to think that your insult made him push himself that bit harder to beat his affliction. Blonde vigilante made me beat my heroin addiction via a similar method...
Wow! You ARE famous....
Blonde Vigilante- yeah, you know it.
Creepy- he really did, how he landed Bobbi Brown was beyond me, she was really hot and she married him for a minute.
Brewer of Leaves- he may have walked away wounded but he recovered quickly, he found another taker that night within about 3 minutes. Thank God for Groupies....
Haley O- always have been, you just don't even know. ha, ha...
Another scintillating tale of groupies and gropies.
i hope you never make fun of my genital warts or lazy eye.... i would never be able to take that rejection...
Dale- I was never ever a groupie- too much class for that! Those are fighting words Dale, what did we talk about earlier...
Al- ok, now - time to laser those lil nasties away if you want any nookie from me. The lazy eye? We'll see depends how much it creeps me out..... Maybe an eye patch will be in order...
I totally wanted to make-out with Jani Lane back when I was in Grade 8, I loved Warrant. I thought he was smokin' hot. Damn, Shroom, I'll just have to live as a cool chick vicariously through you...
God, I hope that's a true story.
Maybe you're just part of the prick-tease subset of groupies who get these rock stars so frustrated that they have to turn to smack to calm themselves down. That would be funny.
Angela- he looked better on TV than in person, trust me, it was not fuckable
Butchieboy- true story....
Christopher- yeah, I don't think I had that kind of power but that would have been a good one to have.
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